My Big Love

It was the same time last year when I called you up just to greet you. You told me that no one have ever called you at 12 am just for that and that I was the first one. That was also the first time I did that.

I have the knack for preparing birthdays especially to special individuals in my life. I convinced you to attend Mass at the Cathedral to thank Lord for another year He has given you. After the Mass, we ate at Shakey's, anxious if anybody familiar sees us. The day after, I prepared several surprises for you with the help of some close friends. The happiness in your eyes can't be hidden as you thank me for celebrating that special day with you. And you know that the next day, our little fantasies will be over and we have to face the issues that confront us. I just have to let you go.

But unintentionally, we actually didn't let each other go. And here we are, still in our blissful fantasies, now trying to make them reality. Our love letters may have gone but the I-love-you's never disappeared, not even for a single day since we've been together. You told me we still have forever to make this love lovelier.

You told me to make a list of our to-do's so that you won't be able to forget all the plans we have. Well, here is my working list (those I remember):

-Go on Kart Racing (You promised me this! haha)
-Ride the Pasig Ferry (kasalanan ng I Miss You Like Crazy)
-Watch fireworks together (yeah. we watched back when we were just friends, it's different when we're already a couple. cheesy much)
-Go to Dahilayan Forest Park, Bukidnon (kasalanan naman ito ng Forever and A Day)
-Go Island Hopping and Snorkeling at Coron, Palawan (it's sooooo beautiful there!)

Namentalblock na ata ako. haha

-Be close to each other's families and circle of friends
-Go to Singapore (mayaman? haha.)
-Watch a concert together
-Go to Vigan,Ilocos Sur (for more historical trips!)
-Go to Tagaytay (dapat kasi ngayon na to kaya lang natakot sa fish kill. haha)
-Roadtrip! (dpat atin na kang car)
-Comedy bar! (last year pa to, hindi na matuloy-tuloy)
-Try more and more and more and more restaurants and kainans

It's a working list. And I hope one by one we can put a long slash on them.

I have the same wish for you. Happiness. Happiness in every aspect of your life. A successful career, a loving family and group of friends. A good health (hindi na pwedeng maospital ulit!)

Though we have some really tough times lately, I know that this relationship is still worth fighting for and I still have the high hopes that this will last long. You'll always be my big baby, the one I'm taking care of when you're sick or lonely and the one who makes me happy. You've called me your baby for over a year now, the one brat you always have to be patient with and the one who makes you happy. This may not be a perfect relationship, but we know it's real.

I love you boss. And a happy birthday to you :)

Break-Up

One of my final requirements for my PanPil12 class is to gather all my past facebook statuses and make a poem out of them, with very minimal editing. Well, this is the end product.

Break-Up

This is too much to take..
Maybe you are right. i just had enough of you...
Kung may problema, pwede naman nating pagusapan di ba?
Or maybe that was too much to ask..

Saan na napunta yung sinasabi nilang "chemistry" nating dalawa?
Why am i getting the feeling that i'm not yet enough for you?
Will it always be so close yet so far away?
I thought it was real, then i woke up and realized that it was just a dream..

This time i don't think i'll take the risk
It's kinda hard giving up when I invested so much. but enough is enough
Ayoko na. Lagi na lang ganyan.
Hindi ko gusto ang mga nangyayari pero parang wala nman akong magagawa..

It has been a year.
Why am i feeling this way again? this shouldn't be.
Sinanay mo kasi ako eh, yan tuloy...
Past is past. wag na lang magpaapekto.

Get over it.
Mind your own business. Enough with messing my life.
If it's meant to be, it will be.
Kung tayo, tayo talaga.

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well, some lines don't perfectly fit. it's hard you know. haha.

While I was retrieving my past fb statuses, I realized how sentimental I can get when I post them. Parang may gustong patamaan talaga. I can't help but reminisce the stories behind these. There I realized the reason why it all went wrong and how it eventually worked out for everyone. :)

Over It

It took me less than a week to get over it.
To be over that night when I played Spider Solitaire to divert my attention.
There are many things that I should be thankful for.
I learned who my true friends are. And those who really care.
And just like last year, I know the next academic year will be full of fun surprises for me.

Life is like a game. You have to take your chances.
I took mine.
And just like any other game, there are the ones who go home happy and some who don't.
I guess I belonged to the latter.

Maybe I had my time. And it was over.
I have no one to blame.
I do not really care anymore.

Maybe I should write the Specific Plan of Action of my own life.
Fix all the mistakes I have previously committed,
Before I take over in trying to fix others.
Find ways to be happy, contented and successful in the near future.

I'm done with this dream, this aspiration.
I have to accept that I am not for it, or some don't want me for it.
I'm over this.


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Remember that time when I said that life will never be the same for the both of us since that somebody left. Yeah, I have proven that right.